the heart of the beast

                   WHERE HAVE I BEEN, WHERE HAVEN'T I BEEN
I have seen the underside of the beast working my way back out. The atrocities I have had to endure the past few months are beyond recognition. i have been thrown to the street more times than i can remember, if you die i will get blamed, no one ever dies from withdrawal, you are to blame, junkie, er- never come back, 6 months- cannot find your records-no meds for you, surgery's total paralysis or a pump under 9 scars. What about me? Cannot walk, nor sit, neck so swollen so big-thyroid,feet stabbing-spasms gloure curling up no recognition, blood boiling heart forever sore- sweet to sweet, can't take it no more!    Thank you UNCLE SAM YOUR POLOCIES DESTROY , laws make our hearts green , fear is everywhere  , running no cares, so where, where do I go now, how do i get there??? TEAR much PAIN, I am back.                              

this too shall pass

We are BETRAYED at every turn we take. Firstly, we are souls trapped inside a Temple that is crumbling from the inside out. like an old building our bodies pipes,beams, the very foundation it's self is slowly cracking and disintegrating from under us. OUR BODIES, OUR TEMPLES ON EARTH BETRAY US.Then there are those we love that love us, they just do not get it. They haven't a clue about what we go through, how hard we fight just to stay alive. Their frustrations from a lack of understanding (grock ) comes at us like bullets. LOVE, A GENTLE TOUCH BECOMES ELUSIVE AGAIN WE FEEL BETRAYED. Then we get to the healers. They try in their limited way to help us become strong, healthy even stay that way. They do not listen,they do not HEAR what we are saying. They know better than we do about OUR BODIES, they will never be able to truly helps us until they learn to work with us, instead of telling us what they think, it is we who are going through this. What it is we need to heal , WE ARE BETRAYED BY OUR HEALERS, THEY KNOW WHAT WE NEED. In the end they make us sicker our lives become a living hell , BETRAYED.