THIS TOO SHAL PASS~~ NEXT STEP

I WANT TO SIT HERE ALL NIGHT AND WRITE,  MY BODY ~~ SUPPORT ~~ MY STRENGTH. HAS DISINTEGRATED INTO A FAIRLY USELESS  MASS, RIDDLED WITH PAIN~~ I HATE THESE MEDICATIONns .not too happy with my computer either. stuff jumps all over types over other stuff, I digress.  ~~ fairly useless mass, riddled with pain ~~~   how do I count on it,on myself, if I can't even count on a moving mecHAinism (even computer) to support me to aid me in what ever I endeavour. likewitting what or when I want to!    how about a camping trip????? I'm going to cry. clean a closet,that stopped the crying. I would love to see a play or not annoy 1/2 the people I am around.                    ~~~~THE WESTERN DOCTORS HAVE MADE A BIGGER MESS OF MY BODY THAN ANY OTHER MODE OF HEALING I TRIED~~~ I DID ALL MOST ALL 99%  OF WHAT THEY ASKED ME TO DO AND IT IS ALL ALL ALL SO MUCH WORSE~~~~              MUST I LEAVE SO THOSE AROUND ME ARE NOT SO ANGRY, MOST LIKELY I JUST UZZZZZZZZ ANGER. EVEN THOUGH I FEEL NONE.,USUALLY, PAIN OR SADNESS,WITH A DROP OF ANXIETY FOR GOOD MEASURE. THE CLOCK AND MY BACK ARE SAYING GOOD NIGHT ~~I MUST STOP~ LILAH TOV (GOOD NIGHT TO YOU)      ~~~ RUBY LYNN ~~~